As I was finishing my writing this morning, we received such a pleasant surprise visit from our dear friend, Mary, gifting us with a beautiful bouquet of flowers in a lovely vase. Thank you, Mary! And, yesterday afternoon, special friend Val showed up with homemade sourdough and a gourmet dinner. Look up gracious and loving in the dictionary and their two faces will pop up!

I have another good friend, Gary, who loves to read these reflections. The themes are not unfamiliar to him and he lets me know that they touch him each day. But, yesterday, he had some advice. He knows me well. Knows how Diane and I live our lives from day to day and doesn’t want people who don’t really know us, but who are reading this, to think I’m the kind of a guy who sits on a mountain top contemplating his navel, just immersed in really deep things. He has a point!!

Disclaimer Time:

I don’t sit around contemplating my navel. It’s not a particularly pretty sight. Nor does it lead anywhere. Yes, I tend to think and feel deeply. Always have and probably always will. I want to know what lies underneath that which is initially available. But that doesn’t mean I and we don’t spend the vast majority of our time doing really ordinary stuff.

For the record, Diane and I love to laugh and get one another to laugh. We laugh a lot. We like coffee in the morning. I like two cups and at the most, three. Diane likes one cup and sometimes two. We do enjoy our Keurig. I get up early because I’ve been a morning person forever. Sometimes it’s really early as in 3 or 4. My dad was a morning person. Our son, Ross, is or was a morning person. Diane is a night person who was stretched to wake up early. Somehow, it works out. I never turn down a nap if the timing is right.

As a high school senior, I participated in abolishing our high school prom because of its bourgeois values. Diane was prom queen.

I’ve always loved exercise and athletics. Diane played 8th grade basketball but swears she hates exercise. Yet, somehow she manages our two Aussies on a single leash as she does miles each day in our neighborhood.

We both love dogs. We currently have two. They are as different as can be. One is the purebred princess and the other is a rescue sweetheart. I really miss, Sydney, the best dog ever. She left us in 2008 after giving us twelve tremendous years. If I don’t see her in heaven, God and I are going to have a chat.

I can muster huge bursts of energy to tackle really big stuff. And, then I want to shut down to charge the batteries. Diane has unbelievable resources of energy and will, that help her maintain a steady state of giving and living.

We really like the fact we finally have a garden at our little house, now that we’ve lived here for 29 years. Thank you, Mike and Judy! It’s beautiful. We marvel at it morning, day, or night, enjoying its beauty.

We feel extremely blessed that our careers let us be so connected to the lives of hundreds and even thousands of children and the people who support them, be they teachers, staff or other family. We count it a blessing that we may have had some positive impact on their lives.

We feel extremely blessed that we’re no longer in those careers.

We do love kids. But, we don’t mind the break from being surrounded by zillions of them seemingly 24/7.

Diane loves to play Whirly Word and Mexican Train Dominoes. I don’t.

We always hated when retired people said they didn’t know how they fit everything in when they were working full time. Now, we say we don’t know how we fit everything in when we worked full time.

We both love our sons dearly. People boast about their children. I like to say they’ve grown into two terrific young men. They have good hearts and love their mom. What else can we ask for?

I love to read. Not nearly as much as I used to when I devoured books like a starving man. But I still read daily. Surprised?

I’m good at vision and can manage implementation. Diane likes to participate in vision and is a great implementer.

We both absolutely love camping. We love the outdoors. We love our trailer. I think Diane wouldn’t mind if we moved into our trailer.

Diane is a great cook although she might not accept that compliment graciously. She makes wonderful dinners and always makes sure we have enough food of the right kind. I can steam vegetables, heat up leftovers, and do a sorry imitation of a guy grilling. Long ago, I used to be more lukewarm on eating. No longer.

I scored zero on mechanical on my skills inventory in the 9th grade. I knew how to organize a city’s political process and make my way through the daily transcript of Congressional proceedings but couldn’t fix the simplest thing. Eventually, I gained some decent carpentry skills and Diane says I underestimate my abilities to put things together and fix things but, honestly, she’s better at the basics.

I’ve always loved history. Know one or two things about this and that. My dad read the encyclopedia every night before going to sleep. I had a really smart dad who knew a lot and seemed to remember all of it. Sharp as a tack until the day he died at 87. But, I had to come to a realization that that nightly encyclopedia thing was one indicator that my parents may have had sex only three times. Thus, me, my brother and sister. (Since, we all emerged into this world within a two week span in early February, each two years apart, the month of May could have some particular importance.)

I love music. I think all those years playing the violin helped me appreciate music even more. Originally, I didn’t get the Beatles as everyone else did. I got Vivaldi. I practiced every day for many years and it was cool to eventually produce beautiful music. I put the violin down after performing the final movement of Beethoven’s seventh symphony as third chair. Sports called. Later, I loved The Doors, The Who, Bowie and lots of other great artists of the 60s and 70s. I really like our new Sonos speakers and Spotify. We’ve been Pandora people for awhile but Spotify is tremendous!

There was a time when my full head of thick hair cascaded down to my shoulders. I had to keep telling the boys, however, that I was never a hippie. They only partially believed me. Now, I’m doing an imitation of Telly Savalas.

I used to love playing tennis and body surfing really big waves. The bigger the waves the better. There were several very close calls. I swam competitively and was OK. I was a sprinter. Long distance was 100 yards. My brother, Grant, was a an extremely good swimmer and one of our nation’s top high school water polo players. He had a gift. I just liked to play anything even if I didn’t truly excel. Now, because of a spinal issue, I can’t do anything that will be too risky. No horseback riding. No racquet ball. The neurologist says not to trip and fall a certain way or get rear ended by another car. Wouldn’t be a pretty thing. Steady as it goes.

But, I can hike. And, I love it. Diane has grown to love it, too, and we love to explore nature’s wonders together. Diane is an unbelievable hiker. She won’t admit to that but it’s true. You should have seen her go up Mt. Mansfield, the tallest mountain in Vermont. Really tough ascent in biting cold, with 50mph winds at the summit. We really could only stand up for a few moments. I don’t think it phased her.

Neither of us watch much television. We each have a couple of shows we follow on our own, but most evenings, we choose from a handful of titles to watch together if we watch at all. Netflix has helped. Neither of us likes a lot of violence. But, we can handle most PG-13. No zombies or Kill Bill for me. Diane likes Saturday Night Live. I don’t think I’ve ever stayed up late enough in my life to see it.

We both enjoy football. Diane loves when I watch it with a son or two. I loved watching football with my dad. I don’t know if we watched more than a small handful of games this year. The Chargers and the old hometown favorite 49ers were dismal. I’m sorry I tend to be a fair weather fan in my old age. However, little is better for me than standing on the sidelines of my former school, (which has great football and great coaches), and enjoying the whole Friday night thing. Now, that’s living!

Ok. I admit that I have a geeky side. Hard to imagine with this body, I know. But, I read the tech pages and puff up my shoulders a bit when Diane has a problem with the computer and I manage a solution.

I used to think my friend Mike had the corner on researching everything to the bone before making a purchase. He still may. He’s a really bright guy that knows a whole lot. But, I’m not bad, either. I admit I develop Excel spreadsheets that include all sorts of variables before diving in to big decisions. I’m amazed what an Excel spreadsheet can do.

Why is it that sometimes I find out it wasn’t such a good decision, after all?

Being retired, we really enjoy carving out moments, especially in the early morning and evening, to be together. Chatting about this and that, as well as things that are on our minds.

We love to travel but are really just getting our sea legs on this. Being educators, we’re amazed that there’s a world out there outside of summer. We’re so thankful when school is in session so we can have peace and quiet on our journeys. And, all those highways outside of California that seem empty for miles!

Once in awhile, I wistfully imagine that I travel those highways on my Harley or BMW like our good friend, Lee Bradley. What was that movie? Wild Hogs? But, my sciatic would be on redline and I wouldn’t have the slightest idea of what to do when, 100 miles from nowhere, the engine stopped. Diane asks me every now and then if she should get me a motorcycle for my birthday. That’s sweet of her but a non starter.

We’re enjoying really getting to know the ins and outs of the great western United States. We’ve put a lot of miles on our very cool 2014 diesel 4×4 Jeep Grand Cherokee. 33 miles a gallon average over long distance. That’s what I’m talkin’ about! And, yes, that mid sized SUV pulls our 28 foot travel trailer with the slide out. We plan on a Mediterranean cruise to celebrate our 30th anniversary this summer. Can’t wait and hope it works out!

Up until several weeks ago, I was quite the gym rat, training to climb that magnificent mountain in Colorado, as well as get in great shape for a 62 year old. The usual routine on most days was about 15-20 minutes of light weights to tone and keep the core strong. Then, on to the recumbent bike for a hard ride of 60 minutes at about 100+ RPM, bagging maybe 19 miles. Then 30-60 minutes on the stair climber or treadmill. I liked climbing the Empire State Building one or more times in that timespan. All of that, of course, came to a screeching halt because of a little arterial issue.

We love getting together with others … laughing and sharing stories. We have great friends. Period.

We say grace each night before dinner. We give thanks for many things and then we petition God to help out with lots of stuff. Usually those things are the challenges facing loved ones and friends. But, there are other things, too. Visitors to our table always are invited to hold hands and participate in the blessing, although we don’t ask anyone to lead unless we think they want to.

You probably don’t want to know that we now eat dinner around 5:30 every night. Check next year and it may be 5.

I used to probably make one movie a year. Let’s see if there’s a James Bond movie out. Now, Diane and I are into catching the morning features at cheap prices with the old folks. We recently discovered the reclining seats at the Angelika Film Center in Carmel Mountain. What a deal. Includes complimentary coffee.  The old folks are probably commenting that they’re happy being around the aging bald guy.

We have anxieties like everyone. We worry about all sorts of things, despite how we’re taught. But, we give up those frailties as part of life. Also, I think it helps to manage those things through sharing, being transparent, and being alongside others who can relate.

We hope for a community and a country and a world that can rise above strife and violence. We hope for all sorts of things.

We hope we’re around, sound of body and mind, for many many years.

I apologize if this is the most self-centered, boring thing you’ve ever read. Blame Gary.