A friend wrote me to say he felt called to get into the canoe but that he hadn’t. He seems to want to. Which makes sense, since he feels the tug. I can relate.

And the thing about this friend, he’s one of the truly great people. Loving, giving, as in the shirt off his back giving, humble, values the truly important things in life. Whip-smart, well-read. Some would say he got in that canoe a long long time ago. But, he doesn’t seem to think so. I get that.

I wrote about this topic briefly at the very beginning of this little journey. As in, sometimes we just need to surrender. This particular challenge I’m facing would qualify.

It’s axiomatic that there are no atheists in foxholes. “I give up! I can’t stand it! I’ll do anything if you just make this cease!”

But, what about the other times? What about when things are not at flood stage crisis?

Why on earth should we leave solid ground? Especially to enter a journey we can’t Google Earth or map with perfect waypoints and precision? That’s just crazy. Or irresponsible. Or illogical. Good points. Glad you mentioned it.

When we have nothing left, there is no alternative to surrender. I’m starving. Hurt. Lost. All tapped out. This is the plight of the Prodigal in Luke 15. I’m a Jew eating with pigs after squandering my father’s money on prostitutes and all sorts of heinous things. Think about it. A Jew eating with pigs, violating multiple commandments that have structured his people’s lives forever. Tapped out. There is no tomorrow.

“But, hey”, says the regular person, ” I’m not the Prodigal. I’m doing ok. Maybe not dancing on the roof tops ok. Maybe more muddling than ok but I’m doing ok. Maybe I’m doing better than ok.  Maybe I look around and life is actually pretty good. I’m healthy. Own my home with a mortgage that doesn’t strangle me. My kids are not addicted to narcotics or in prison. I have a spouse I actually like. My job isn’t perfect but what job is? Or, maybe I have a job I love and that is fulfilling. My kids are unbelievably successful. I can fill the Christmas card letter with their accomplishments. I have no debilitating ailments. I get to take trips to exotic locations. Sure, I’ll die someday but that’s then and this is now.”

“I hear this surrender thing and it makes no sense. Or, maybe I can sort of grasp it in some vague theoretical way but come on. Tell me, again, what exactly am I supposed to surrender? And, why should I do that? And, then what happens?”

The last thing I’d want to do is to communicate some holier than thou message. We’ll get to this in a little bit but surrender is more than a one time event. I do believe it’s a one time event but that’s just the beginning. The launch pad. Then the journey in surrender begins.

Has there been a more countercultural idea presented?

Believers (I use that word to describe others who believe that Jesus is God and not just a manifestation of God or a moral teacher, etc…) struggle with this as much as anyone. I have given workshops with my dear friend, Geoff, on Jesus’ story of the father, straying younger brother and rule-following elder brother. We’ve actually role played the part. Geoff always asked, tongue in cheek, why he had to play the elder brother! “Why does Brad get to play the younger brother who experienced the shower of grace?” I used to reply that he would never want to be the younger brother before he received the shower of grace.

It is very, very hard to surrender when we have it going for us. This is as hard for believers as for those who do not subscribe to a Christian understanding of reality.

Dallas Willard, a giant of the faith, said that the vast majority of Christians are what he called “bar code Christians.” They accept Jesus as Lord and bingo, they’re guaranteed entrance into heaven. Sure, we should probably follow some rules and do some good deeds in the meantime but our faith has saved us. Period. What else is there to surrender? He had quite a lot to say on that.

Furthermore, surrender is very un-American. Have any of our heroes surrendered? No, they give it all. They fight the good fight til the bitter end, whether victory or defeat. We are bred to climb and push and battle and to ignore suffering. My father, the Marine, used to ask me the same question all of the time when I was a fairly new principal. I had a tough staff. A really tough staff. Old and entrenched, many of whom couldn’t comprehend changing their practice. At all. A few of the more powerful ones seemed to be working overtime to get rid of me or at least make my life insufferable. My dad would listen on the phone to my tales of woe and would then say, “Bradley, are the odds against you worse than 100:1?” Hearing my silence or a humble “No,” he could always say, “Well then, you’ve got them right where you want them!” And, he’d laugh and I would feel better.

Confession: I like the heroes and the heroic stories. I don’t like surrendering without a fight, if it’s the right fight. Further confession: I believe life is about a fight. There is a battle … or many battles … and we ARE called to persevere.

So, what’s the distinction? What is it that we should give up and how do we do that if we’re looking around and can’t really see the enemy at the gates?

Control.

As in, “I got this.” All of the time. I can manage it on my own. My life is my own and my job is to ensure that the rest of the world conforms to my wishes. My spouse. My kids. My employees. My health. My community. My club. My church.

Many Christians like to say God is in control. And, I won’t argue with them. The problem is that there are a whole lot of Christians who then go about trying to control others in their own image. I’m not immune to this and neither are atheists or practitioners of many other faiths. I can’t afford to go off on a tangent right now but I’ll just say that a moral relativism which abdicates responsibility for definitively stating right and wrong is just as bad.

Control goes deeper than the way we try to control our environment. The most insidious control is when we allow things to control us. Things that do not have our best interest in mind. Things that, in and of themselves, aren’t necessarily bad. I spoke of them as alternative rivers several days ago.

All of us have idols. They are the things that draw the greatest bandwidth from our minds and hearts. No one is immune. All are pursued as a search for fulfillment. Is the quest for wealth or wisdom every satiated? Are those our gods? What happens when the children move out and on? Does that leave a large hole that is tough to fill? I’ll repeat what I implied a couple of days ago: Working at a good job and providing a good income is a very good thing. Devotion to family is a good thing. Acquiring knowledge and attaining wisdom is a good thing. But, when we place ultimate value in any of these or of so many other things, that is not a good thing.

This is why the Gospel is so radical. It is not about acquisition (skills, accomplishments, heaven). It’s about submission. (Letting down the defenses. Acknowledging weakness. Asking for forgiveness for the things we’ve done and continue to do that we recognize as wrong, overly judgmental, insensitive, mean-spirited.) The surrender is living in the space that seeks to replace these things with minds focused on the needs of others as well as hearts that grow in the capacity to love. The surrender is recognizing that the heavens and the earth have intersected and that we can live more fully into that heavenly dimension in this life. But, we can’t do it without giving up control. We can’t do it unless we’re willing to be transparent and at least somewhat vulnerable. Yes, we run the risk of appearing weak when, in fact, new found strength is built on rock and not on sand. We can’t do it alone. We need to be in community with others.

There’s a reason Jesus was followed by people called disciples. Put simply, disciples are students who seek to learn from the teacher and who have committed to disciplined practice. Learners do not stay in the same place. They can look rearwards and see that they have grown and changed in the ways that matter. They are fundamentally transformed as time passes.

Surrender is saying, “I want what you have. I sense or know that it is better than what I have right now.” With reference to the story of the Prodigal, the elder brother sees nothing better than what he has right now. He only fears loss. He thinks he has it all. In fact, the father tells him he’s right. Just not  in the way the elder son sees it. He is blind and one can sense that breaks the father’s heart. The parable ends as it should.

Which brings us back to the problem of surrender. We have a number of ways to look at the plight and outcome of the younger brother. We can delight that a truly broken person is raised up, forgiven and loved. Or, we can say his plight is of no real concern to me. We can choose to think that we are completely dissimilar or that, in fact, the only difference between the two of us is maybe a matter of a few degrees. “There but for the grace of God, goeth I.” And, we have a number of ways to look at the plight and outcome of the elder brother. We can urge him to open his heart and to forgive like we do. We can bemoan his stark and judgmental posture. We can nod knowingly that he may be missing the boat altogether. Or, we can look inwards and go, I see myself. “There but for the grace of God, goeth I.”

Our friend, Pat, is pondering the relationship between surrender and obedience. I would say that the question is what are we surrendering that exercises control over us in ways (if we search deeply) we recognize as ultimately not fulfilling? And, to what or whom are we offering obedience in its/their place? Anyone who thinks that he or she is master of the universe has a rude awakening coming. Unfortunately, it’s in our nature to live that fiction. On the other hand, it’s also in our nature to submit to the ultimate truth.

Finally, surrender is not a one time thing. There may be a profound moment or event. A singular recognition and choice. But, it’s a daily thing that requires constant attention. Sometimes two steps forward and one backwards. Or vice versa. Everywhere we look, things beckon that argue against fidelity to the Person and things that are the most fulfilling. This is another reason that the kind of life that is offered is not easy. It requires commitment and community. It requires a vision of what is being offered and allowing it in. It is then a matter of seeking the means, which abound. This is the river. Yes, it’s about saying, “I will step into that canoe. One time. And I will stay in this canoe every day.” The river beckons. It’s an unbelievable ride. I don’t know a person who has chosen to enter that canoe who regrets it for a second.

Jesus says, in Matthew 11:28-30, “Come to me all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

We’re all yoked to something. Period.

Most of us have heard this beautiful song many times. It’s a song of surrender and redemption. Of blindness and sight. Of battles and peace. Of the deepest pits and the greatest joy. If you’re unfamiliar with the circumstances behind the composer, John Newton, it’s worth checking out. I can never get enough of the lyrics or its many renditions. It’s probably my favorite song.

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me,
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now, I see.

T’was Grace that taught…
my heart to fear.
And Grace, my fears relieved.
How precious did that Grace appear…
the hour I first believed.

Through many dangers, toils and snares…
I have already come.
Tis Grace has brought me safe thus far…
and Grace will lead me home.

The Lord has promised good to me…
His word my hope secures.
He will my shield and portion be…
as long as life endures.

When we’ve been there ten thousand years…
bright shining as the sun.
We’ve no less days to sing God’s praise…
than when we’ve first begun.

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me….
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now, I see.

God bless all of you and thank you for listening.